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As a Colorado Springs divorce lawyer, I often see clients who are intent on getting the best deal for in their divorce agreement, regardless of how it affects the rest of their family.  I often attribute this to what I call “divorce anxiety”, a condition that changes normal, fully functioning people into vicious, selfish and vindictive would-be litigators with an eye on the prize. 

Divorce anxiety can take many forms, but its roots are based in fear; fear of the unknown, fear of being alone, and fear of financial ruin.  As a result, they often play the “victim”, and pour all their anxiety and energy into seeing to it that their partner fails. 

When most people think about “winning” their divorce, they are talking about financial balance sheets, spousal support and the division of assets in a property agreement.  But very few people ever really “win” in a divorce situation.  In fact, most divorced couples will agree that everybody loses, especially the children.

Problem is, so many clients are busy digging their heels and fighting over meaningless possessions, that they lose sight of the true prize – their children.  But broken hearts evoke strong emotions, which often clouds the judgment of divorcing spouses, making every issue much more contentious than it needs to be.

A good divorce lawyer will help their clients stay focused on the best interests of their children, and remind them that while all their material possessions can be replaced, their children cannot.  When the well-being and emotional development of children of the children is paramount, most couples find it much easier to come to an agreeable resolution and hasten the settlement of their divorce.  Even when parents do everything right, children still must witness the breakdown of their family, and the breakup of the two most important people in their lives.  Depending on the child, this kind of emotional trauma can require counseling even if the divorce is uncomplicated.  Just imagine how much more deeply scarred a child can be if their parents are constantly fighting.

If you are seeking a divorce in Colorado, remember to consider the needs of your children as more important than your own.  A Colorado Springs divorce lawyer can help you keep your focus on the kids, and work toward a more amicable post-divorce relationship with your ex-spouse. 

Patricia Marrison is a Family Law attorney in Colorado Springs, CO. and the owner of the Marrison Family Law LLC, Colorado Springs largest Family Law practice.  The Marrison Family Law LLC is devoted to assisting with the difficulties of the breakup of relationships, be it common law marriage, a non-marriage with children, or dissolution with or without children. We attempt to serve the entire spectrum of relationships, from those couples with the simplest, uncontested dissolution to the highly conflicted relationship involving allegations of domestic abuse.