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If you keep up with the news, it’s hard not to notice that infidelity has become an epidemic in America.  Tiger Woods may get the most news coverage, but he is just one of many notable figures who have admitted to cheating on their wives.  Senators, Congressmen, and many notable celebrities have been known to break their vows, but that doesn’t necessarily mean they will end up in divorce court.  As a Colorado Springs family lawyer, I have seen many couples separate and then come back together even stronger than ever.  

If you are the one who has been cheated upon, you may think divorce is your only option, but divorce is a very big step.  Take the time to answer a few questions before the papers are filed.  Even though it may seem hopeless right now, your marriage may be worth saving. 

1) Is your spouse truly sorry, or is he or she just telling you what they think you want to hear?

2) How likely is it that your spouse will cheat again?  Do you foresee yourself being able to trust him or her again?  This may not happen overnight, but is your spouse willing to take the necessary steps to regain your trust? 

3) Can you handle the reality of living with your spouse after such a breach of trust has occurred?

4) Do you have the emotional maturity to get beyond this and move the relationship forward in a positive direction, or are you afraid the affair will always be on your mind even after counseling?

5) Do you feel the need to get revenge on your spouse by hurting him or her back or, worse yet, having an affair of your own?

6) Has anything changed that may prevent an affair from happening again?  For example, is your spouse still working in the same environment where it all started or has he or she started a new job?  Is he or she still spending a lot of time online, where the temptation to meet someone online may still exist?

I always encourage my Colorado Spring separateion and divorce clients to ask themselves these important questions and try to save their marriage if at all possible.  Separation may still be necessary, but divorce is a big step that must be entered into very seriously.  In order to really get to the bottom of why your spouse was unfaithful and whether the marriage can be saved, marital counseling is usually recommended. 

If you and your spouse choose to separate until a final decision is made, then it is important to have a separation agreement in place.  This will allow the courts to make a temporary order of spousal support, child support and custody while you are living apart.  A  family lawyer at Marrison Law in Colorado Springs can help you file the necessary paperwork to help you get through a period of separation. 

Patricia Marrison is a Family Law attorney in Colorado Springs, CO. and the owner of the Marrison Family Law LLC, Colorado Springs largest Family Law practice.  The Marrison Family Law LLC is devoted to assisting with the difficulties of the breakup of relationships, be it common law marriage, a non-marriage with children, or dissolution with or without children. We attempt to serve the entire spectrum of relationships, from those couples with the simplest, uncontested dissolution to the highly conflicted relationship involving allegations of domestic abuse.